All Things Ellie

It's like Sex and the Suburbs and 30 Rock all rolled into one…

AFRA: Texting Girls

Dear Ellie,

So I like this girl. We had a pretty great first date, and both agreed that we need to get together soon. The night lasted for about 12 hours, neither of us wanted it to end. I mean, it had to. We had jobs to go to. My friend said that I should wait 48 hours before contacting her again. Is that really a rule? And is texting her okay? Should I call instead?

Thanks,

Cellophone Challenged

Dear CC,

I don’t fucking know the proper etiquette. This has been something I have struggled with since I was pretty enough to go on actual dates and cellphones became more common place. Look, I understand – no one wants to seem like creeper stalker guy. Of course there’s the flip side and waiting too long may appear as if you’re not interested. So what’s a guy or girl really to do?

About three months ago I went on a date with a seemingly really great guy. We kept running into each other and finally decided a date was a great idea, and it was great. But then three days went by and he never contacted me. I began to get a little nervous, mainly because we typically ran into each other on Thursdays for some odd reason and Thursday was fast approaching. (The odd reason being we typically went to the same bar to sing some karaoke before heading home after work. We both worked evenings.) When I did run into him, I wasn’t quite sure how to act. He asked me why I was being reserved and I explained that since he hadn’t contacted me, I didn’t want to make assumptions. He then explained this rule he had heard about waiting 72 hours to contact a girl after a date. Suffice to say, it wasn’t going to work out. He thought I was odd for having expected to hear back from him sooner.

I’m not saying text the girl hours after the date. Or blow up her phone with messages. Don’t do those things. My honest advice is, depending on how you feel and how much fun you both had, contact her somehow the day after. Do not wait more than 48 hours. How you contact her is a matter of how your lives are. I personally prefer texting. My job is pretty demanding and I’m not allowed to have my phone with me at work. By texting I can reply quickly when I’m on break, and not worry about catching someone at a bad time. I also, unless driving, tend to have a severe dislike of talking on the telephone. Another solution is, when the night is winding down, agree upon a day and method to contact her. It illustrates that you’d like to arrange another time to meet up to continue to get to know her. It’ll also help you gauge exactly how interested she is in spending time with you. And that’s my honest to goodness answer.

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This entry was posted on August 28, 2010 by in Uncategorized.
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